An Outing With Pearl.....

I have managed to reduce the number of times I have to haul Pearl around-(thank goodness for Peapod!!)- but she does have to go to the bank every so often. We made that trip after I'd worked half a day and from the outset she entertained me with her complaints. As she got into the car..."Oh I don't feel good! My heart, my eyes, my legs...."(She IS 89!!) I asked about the easiest one-"Your eyes? Are you getting those bumps back?" "Oh yes! I have to wash them out 3-4 times a day!" But I know that she won't want to go back to the eye surgeon after an experience that she can complain about forever! I then changed the subject , knowing that there are no answers that will make her happy...as she has said before "Excuses, excuses, thats all you give me!" when I try to explain the medical reasons for her discomfort. Do understand that all major complaints have been checked out by specialists and the overall result is THAT IT IS OLD AGE WEARING OUT HER BODY PARTS!
ANYHOW....I hit it off with the banker we talked to and we chatted about our dogs, teenagers, vacations while we waited for the funds to be transferred from one of her accounts to another. He asked if Pearl and I were friends, or....and I told him she was my m-i-l, his comment was "You get along so well!" I laughed my @$$ off!!! When he left the room Pearl commented "He sure does like to talk a lot!", mainly because she was unable to hear some and she is NOT a dog person. She doesn't like not being fawned over! As we left the bank he said to her "You sure are lucky to have her (me)!" Well, I think she had a mini-stroke with that!!
After a quick stop at Dominicks, I was leaving her apartment but she wasn't done with me. "Look at my legs-they are all swollen and bruised!" I looked- she has varicose veins and spider veins! And I told her so and she didn't like that. She is going to call LifeLine Screenings (they keep sending her brochures and she keeps signing up for the same tests!) and ask them about it! I started to inhale to explain "screenings" and then I thought-Let her call them, they deserve it for trying to suck even more money out of her!
She also asked if I remembered when we had gone out for her son's birthday dinner? I had gathered her food as it was a buffet and she didn't want to get up. Sonny came back with a plate piled high with lox and shrimp and "I could have cried! It looked so good!" I said WHY wouldn't you ask us to get you some, you know I don't like fish and I never thought about it! "Well, I didn't want to bother anyone...." I said "Too bad, 'grandson' would have been more than happy to get you some, he's a very nice guy.." She is a pip!!!!